I have been honored to raise a family of four boys alongside my wife, Shawntel. Together, we have worked to instill in them the values we believe are most important in life: how to care for others, the importance of hard work, have a positive attitude, appreciation for what we have, and so many others. Beyond being a good person, I believe these lessons have a direct impact on the level of success you will experience in life. As a business leader and serial entrepreneur, my ability to be a strong and effective leader has played a major role in my success.

PUT IN THE HARD WORK

Leadership is one of those skills that is best taught by example. I was lucky to have in my great examples in my parents growing up and have worked to be a positive example for my children throughout their lives. It starts with a lesson my parents taught me from a young age: to have anything in life, it requires hard work. If you are striving for that promotion, saving for date night, or studying to get into your dream college, everything will require dedicated time and effort. But hard work is about more than just the time you put in. It’s about persevering through the setbacks. This includes one of the most difficult things about being dedicated to your dream: embracing the “No.” Learning to look at each “No” as progress instead of a setback is challenging emotionally and logically. However, reframing the “No” into a step closer to the right “Yes” will enable you to eliminate the fear associated with rejection. The “No” is not failure, but a learning moment. It is through these moments that success is possible. This is a vital step in becoming a strong leader.

HAVE A POSITIVE ATTITUDE

The second lesson my parents taught me was the importance of a positive attitude. If you go through work, life, or your relationship looking for the next roadblock, the next reason to quit, the next unfairness, you will find them strewn about your path in abundance. There is no one who can look at the world through this frame of mind and find success. Instead, you must have a positive attitude that appreciates and recognizes the small (and big) wins, the strokes of luck, and the hidden opportunities. Leaders who inspire their teams are able to visualize success and share that optimism to create a contagious positive attitude throughout their company.

When I look back over my career, it was these two foundational leadership lessons that have enabled me to find success. I have learned to exemplify these skills in the face of challenges and the “No.” I have learned to focus on the vision and keep a positive attitude throughout and use that to inspire my team. This experience is what I used to teach my children the same values and leadership skills throughout their lives. In fact, this is not the first time I have written about the specific actions my wife and I take to instill this into our children. I have written in other blogs about our Red Plate Dinners and the importance of individual recognition and appreciation. I have written about the importance of the search for knowledge and desire to know yourself and those around you, through our Dinner Questions tradition. And I have written about the business trips and money management lessons that enable our children to understand business and personal ownership early on.

LIVE IT DAILY

These are just a few of the specific actions that my family has incorporated into raising our children to be strong and moral leaders. However, there are opportunities every day to teach leadership through example and storytelling. That simple question, “How was your day, Dad?” is an opportunity to teach through a true experience that occurred that day, either in business or personal life. Whether a challenge or success, these stories help our children learn about relationships, business, problem solving, and how to have a positive attitude in the face of adversity.

EMBODY OPENNESS AND HONESTY

We believe that a commitment to openness and honesty provides insight to real-life challenges that adults face throughout their careers and lives. It is likely that one day one of our sons will find himself facing a similar challenge and will be able to recall how his parents handled it and use that knowledge to make the best decision. They will learn daily how to deal with difficult life experiences.

We are so proud of our children and the success they have achieved already. I have seen them carry these lessons out in real life, whether it be in school, golf, baseball, work, or with friends. They are able to process and understand and work through complex problems with a positive attitude and a drive for success. My oldest, Braden, has navigated his career path and has stayed committed to his passion for his own life while achieving success, despite unexpected challenges and the “No.” I see it in him in the way he interacts and supports his friends and how he is supportive and loving to his wife.

REMEMBER HUMILITY AND WILLINGNESS TO LEARN

Each of my children will take a different path and each will encounter challenges and successes. I am proud of the paths they have taken so far and excited to see their continued success as they grow. My wife and I will continue to share with them our life experiences and how we will handle each one. And, knowing my children are growing up to be strong leaders, I too, will listen to their stories and experiences and learn from them because, after all, the final lesson in being a strong leader is knowing when to be humble and learn from those who are wiser than you.

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Photo by Jen Light

Quality time with family is so important. When each of my boys reach 10 years old, they know something special will happen. That is when they begin planning a one-on-one trip with me during the summer for 5 to 7 days. This trip is always to accompany me on a business trip to another city or country, sit in each of the business meetings, and get to experience what it is their father does for a living. What’s exciting is this is a trip they get to have every year and always to a different location.

During the day they sit in everyone of my business meetings which gives me an opportunity to see first hand the relationships that I have and what causes business to progress.  These trips aren’t all work and no play. We are sure to plan experiences that are uniquely important to them and who they are. In the past, my sons have chosen to play golf at a course they’ve always heard about or view a great play in London or NYC, or go to a baseball game at Fenway Park in Boston. I try to give them the experience of visiting my favorite restaurants or sites in cities that I often visit as well to share with them my passions, as well.

It is amazing having my boys with me and sharing that time with them. I greatly enjoy sharing with them my passion for the work I do as well as teaching them why I do and say what I do in meetings, how to act professionally and how to present myself. All of these elements are vitally important to success and are applicable no matter what career path they take in life. These are real life moments where I can take the opportunity to teach them important lessons while at the same time watching grow personally and professionally as they develop their own powerful presence.

With sons who are now 23, 20, 11 and 9, I’m looking forward to the trips this summer. Brennan counted down the months until his 10th birthday, as he knew his trip was coming.  And my second son, Barrett, who turns 21 in April just asked me, “Where are we going this summer, Dad?” The tradition will continue with Bryson, our 9 year old, being he’s already naming the places he wants to go.  The countless memories that have been forged and the experience each of my sons have gained from our family and individual trips, is my way of preparing them for the real life situations that they will experience once they are running their own companies or working in their field of choice. They are developing their leadership skills, world view, and business insights that will be tied to our times together.

The memories for me though are worth more than any trophy or any amount of money that I possess.  Sitting on the plane sometimes by myself reliving in my mind the different trips, deep conversations, the laughter and seeing their eyes light up when they do something they’d only imagined.  Memories…..Braden at 11 years old, staying in London at the Lanesborough Hotel, touring history with my son, seeing a play on London’s “Broadway” and walking the streets of London, eating at my favorite Chinese restaurant Hakkasan and talking about the days meetings.  Waking up in the morning on the coast of California with Barrett at 14 years old, driving in the car to our first meeting and talking about our day, seeing him in the crowd as I spoke at an investment banking conference and feeling more pride knowing one of the most important people in the world was watching me, playing golf in the afternoon then feeling so incredible that night as we watched the San Francisco Giants win their first game of the playoffs in the season they won the World Series.  My first trip with Brennan to Puerto Rico where we boarded the plane and I looked to see the amazing smile of happiness, scuba diving with him in crystal blue water and him standing on stage with me as he spoke with such eloquence and price about some of the most incredible people in the world. Memories I’ll cherish for a lifetime!

These trips are designed to expand my son’s horizons and broaden their worldly perspectives, but I find myself constantly learning from my son’s unique vision and dreams. In the end, I may appreciate these trips even more than my sons do. I cannot wait for our next trip together.

The post PART IV – How Business Trips Will Teach Quality in Work and the Power of Relationships appeared first on Ryan Wuerch.

Photo Credits: Dave Crosby

From time to time someone will ask me how I fit in quality family time while working and traveling. Ultimately, it is all about making the decision to prioritize that part of your life. I have previously talked about my 24 Boxcar theory, where every hour of your day is a boxcar, and you make choices on what to fill those cars with.

Family time must be part of those 24 boxcars, even when I am out of town.

The way I look at it, family time does not always have to be an extensively planned outing. Quality family time is right at our fingertips, yet is often overlooked. I’ve always believed that in order to have quality time, you have to make quantity time. The reality is you can’t make quality time. Rather, you have to have enough quantity of time and then quality time will appear when you least expect it. Take, for example, the daily practice of family dinner. This is a hugely important part of strengthening family and community bonds. It gives families a chance to create engaging conversation between siblings and between children and parents.

It can be easy to get stuck in a rut of daily questions that don’t lead to engagement but instead lead to the same stock answers. Questions such as “What happened today at school?” can often lead to a known dead end answer of “nothing” or “the usual.” While these are important questions to ask your children, they are not the most effective way to bond and grow with them. That’s why, during my family time, I’ve found it invaluable to ask questions that spark the imagination, expand knowledge, and get everyone involved to create cross-generational relationships. These types of questions can range from the personal to the aspirational to the theoretical.

One way to spark true engagement is to make it a game by creating or purchasing a deck of dinner table question cards with a prompt or question that will start conversation about a topic that may never have arisen otherwise. Questions such as: “Where would you choose to live if you had to live in another country?” “Which wild animal would you most like to be?” “Which family or school rule would you most like to change?” “Is it more charitable to spend your money or time?

Through these conversations we learn more about our own hopes, dreams, and aspirations as well as those of our family, all over a single dinner.

One of the most significant benefits of these conversations to our family, which always seem to expand beyond the original scope of the question asked, is we get a chance to learn that we share many of the same hopes and dreams for ourselves as we do for one another, giving us a unique chance to learn from one another and a deeper understanding of how closely we’re all connected through our familial bond.

Another way to engage your children and make them feel special, valued and a part of what you do outside of the home is to bring them into your current environment. Just yesterday morning, as our 11 year old son, Brennan, was having breakfast and getting ready for school I said to him, “Brennan, I’d really like to tell you about all the different business deals I have going on right now so you can understand every time I’m talking about it at home. I’d also like to get your thoughts on some things.” He immediately got a smile on his face and said, “I’d like that.” Yesterday afternoon when he came home from school, one of the first things he asked me was, “Dad, can you tell me about all the deals you’re working on?” It was obvious to me that he’d been waiting all day to talk with me about it. Sometimes all it takes is to simply engage and get the conversation going.

These are just some of the ways I work to build relationships with my sons and my wife. I try to be very purposeful with the sometimes limited time I have with my family whether it is through the Red Plate tradition, helping them learn about finances and investment or simply through talking with them over dinner, and I am very thankful for each of these moments with my family.

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I previously have written about creating meaningful traditions that last, and how in our family, one way to do this is with the special “Red Plate” that symbolizes a special event or achievement from one of us in our home. It can be a birthday, a graduation, special sporting event or accomplishment, or it could even be the day of a doctor’s appointment, but whomever comes to the kitchen table in the morning and sees the Red Plate at where they sit, they know they are going to be celebrated. Every one of us – my four sons, my wife Shawntel, and I – all look forward to seeing the Red Plate.

Our family has another way of creating meaningful traditions.  Another major event happens when our boys reach their 10^th birthday, when they have the opportunity to accompany me to a meeting with my stockbroker, and learn what the stock market is and how it works. And on that special day I place $1,000 into their stock account, and my boys have 100% control what happens to it – I let them manage it as they see fit, as long as they keep the money in the stock trading account. They are in charge of choosing the stocks, researching the companies, which I’ve found provides an invaluable lesson in beginning to understand financial management and develop skills that will serve them well throughout their lives.

My son Brennan made his first stock picks when he turned 10 years old this past July: Facebook, Apple and Amazon. Only 7 months after he picked his first stocks for his account, he’s seen a 21% gain in his portfolio.  I’ll never forget taking his older brother Braden (who is now 22 years old) to open up his stock trading account when was 10 years old.  He sat with my broker wearing a blue sport coat and so eager about what he was getting to do.  Braden bought Coca Cola because it was his favorite drink, McDonalds because it was his favorite restaurant, Best Buy because he thought it was the coolest store, AOL because he loved the internet and Gateway because it was his computer. In his first two years Braden had a 38% return in his portfolio! That included a 6.7% return in his first several months, and his brother Brennan is even showing some of the same return results.

What does this show? That in investing, as in so many other areas of life, it’s good to go with what you know and like! I remember my brokers saying to the boys to not think of the stock market as charts, graphs or newspaper headlines but rather think of it as way to buy a part of the companies you think are great and that you think will be great for a long time, the Warren Buffet philosophy.  The boys were instructed to take two weeks and ask me what companies that they liked were public or private. It was after two weeks that they were to buy companies they like, buy what their friends like, and what they and their friends would like for a long time. None of those things took a computer program to analyze.

This tradition of investing has imparted so much wisdom to my boys, like lessons in money management and sound investment principles. It’s also a good way to impart the values of saving as well has learning how money can be put to work for work, as opposed to spending money on things that don’t provide a valuable return.

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People often ask me “How do you do it?” How do I spend so much focused time with my family, at work, training for marathons and with philanthropic causes and still manage to make the time high value and high quality? As I’ve talked about in a previous blog, it is all about living with purpose.

We tend to live in a microwave and fast-food society where we want everything immediately and as cheap as possible. But throughout my life I’ve found that enduring results and reward actually come through consistently doing the right thing with consistency over a long period of time. A good family friend, Tommy Thompson, said to me when our eldest son, Braden, was just 6 years old, “You can never really have quality time with your children unless you have quantity time with them, because you never know when the quality moments will sneak up on you.” There is nothing fast or microwaveable about that.

Early on in our sons’ lives, I decided as a father it was going to be important to establish traditions that could be carried through each of our children’s lives and then be passed down through generations. These traditions would build character, intelligence, values and a heritage. The traditions would also foster a high degree of self-worth and create precious moments with our children.

This is the first of a series of blogs that talks about these different traditions my wife, Shawntel, and I have developed and why I believe they have had a positive impact on our children’s lives and our own as parents.

We have a special red plate that says, “You are special today.” It has become a great symbol in our household. This red plate is placed where our sons sit at the table on days we feel are special or significant for them – it can be a birthday, a graduation, special sporting event or accomplishment, or it could even be the day of a doctor’s appointment. When one of our boys is going to be celebrated, he comes to the table and see the plate in his spot. Immediately, a smile brightens his face because he knows that this morning is his morning. He will get his favorite breakfast and everyone in the family will take a turn telling him why he is special to them. Watching our youngest son wait in anticipation as his older brothers talk about how he is important, valued and unique, creates a sense of happiness, confidence and great worth in him. These moments cannot be replaced or overvalued. Even my wife, Shawntel, and I have come to be excited when we see the red plate at our spot on the table. There is rarely a red plate day without tears of joy.

As a parent, it is vitally important to develop habits that will keep you on purpose with your children. The red plate is an easy way for us to focus on the accomplishments and joys of each of our uniquely special children. Over the years, I passed this tradition on to many of my friends and family. They now use it as their own and it has been so rewarding to hear their positive stories that accompany this new tradition that has been established in their family. This tradition has created such incredible reward for both our children and for us as parents throughout the years.

Do you have a tradition like this in your family? Tell me about in the comments!

Next week, I will elaborate on our family’s traditions and what we actively do to make our family time valuable and high quality.

The post PART I – The Red Plate – Creating meaningful positive family traditions appeared first on Ryan Wuerch.

Herb and me at his printing business

When we got our Seattle Mariners season tickets five years ago we didn’t realize that the greatest thing about the games wasn’t going to be watching baseball but was rather developing a great friendship with Herb and Janice Blackinton who sit directly behind us. We’ve come to know their kids, grandkids and great-grandkids and have relished in hearing Herb’s laughter and stories.  We’ve talked and shared Seattle baseball wins and losses (mostly losses). Herb is 72-years-old and I’ve often said to Shawntel that someday when I’m his age I hope to enjoy life, family and friends like we’ve seen him do.  Recently, he took me aside and confided in me that he has been diagnosed with cancer. He then asked me if I wanted to visit his printing business he had built from the ground up and in which he had found great success. While he sold his business 16 years ago to a large public company which afforded him to live a life that most would dream of, he was still very much a part of his business and its success is a very important piece of who he is.

I visited his business last week. He gave me a tour of the facility and I was able to see his excitement as he talked to me about the large printing presses, their world-class customers, and showed me every aspect of the facility.  As we walked throughout the building, he introduced me to employees as if they were family. He knew everyone by name and I marveled at how many employees had worked with him for their entire careers, some for 18, 20, 25 and 30 years or more.  Each of their stories was amazing.

During our lunch I asked him what three things he felt defined him as a person. He thought for a moment while I waited, knowing this man possessed sage wisdom. He is the type of man I’d be proud to share some of his attributes, a man full of energy and joy, someone who is loved by his family and many friends and is satisfied in his accomplishments, both personal and professional. He smiled then and started with a story.

He told me how he wasn’t a heavy practicing Christian, but he saw himself as someone who embraced Christian values, which was his first point of definition. He was never brought up going to church but it was a constant presence in his life. Each week he would attend Cub Scouts, then Boy Scouts, at a local church. The values learned were embedded in his heart.

The second defining value was to have a conscience. He told me of how early on in his childhood his father had asked him a simple question, “If you find a wallet on the street with two twenties in it, what do you do with it?” Of course you return it. That is the only answer that will provide a clean conscience.  This too was evident in his business. He could not have reached his level of success without truly being honest, open and moral with his work, employees and customers.

The final value was family. This was evident even before we went to lunch as his season tickets were always filled with family members who clearly loved and deeply cared for him. He treats his business the same way. Those employees I met while walking through the printing plant, were not just former employees to him, they were family. Important business relationships are not just business, they are valuable and personal relationships that when cultivated will carry you through the toughest of times and make victory so much better when shared with them.

I thought back to the visit we had just made to his business and could clearly see how these values had been built into every aspect of the success he had created. He had introduced me to employees like friends, showing his heart of love.  Herb again smiled when I told him how I saw these values in his business.

I asked him how he thinks of customers.  He told me it isn’t all that complicated. It was simple, his customers have a need and it is his job to help them solve it. Focus on treating them like family while solving their need and the money will follow.

I’m proud to have been blessed by having Herb in my life. Being diagnosed with cancer is a new challenge in front of him but his smile and optimism once again shows how great a man he is.  Even in the face of a great challenge and without having all the answers, he continues to teach me.  What a great man!

Thank you Herb!

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When I was younger, I was privileged to have a strong and impactful mentor provide me with a lot of the values and knowledge I still instill in my business strategy. For me, this mentor was my father.

My father was the man who taught me more than any one person. He lived his life exemplifying his values through his actions. He taught me to dream, believe that God has given us purpose in our lives and to give to others without expecting a return. He taught me about family and the importance of focusing on them and treating your wife like it is the first date, every day. He showed me how, when things get tough, we must never give up because there is always a way to succeed.

I’ll never forget being in Hong Kong in November 2010 just before I was to be interviewed live on CNBC and receiving word he’d passed away from a long battle with cancer. Sitting in the green room, filled with tears, wanting to be there with my family, and within minutes of going on air, I was ready to walk out when I heard my father’s voice in my head and the statement he’d always make to me: “Finish strong!”  With those words I knew my father would want me to press on and finish my commitment.

Over the last several decades before he passed away, I watched my father become a man of fewer words but the words he’d speak were always filled with profound wisdom. I still hear his voice say, “Do things with low profile but high impact.” I will continue to strive for that and to be like my father for the rest of my life.

The most important part of finding a mentor is being open to the counseling of those more experienced than you. Ask questions and search for insights. Oftentimes, people will enjoy passing down their tidbits of experience.

Who was someone who acted as your mentor? What did you learn from that person?

Tweet to me @RWuerch, I’d love to hear!

The post What Mentors Have Taught Me About Leadership appeared first on Ryan Wuerch.

Hearing him talk about the experience, his excitement and passion, made me an incredibly proud father to know he’s carrying out his purpose in life. He’s up again at 0300 for a dawn jump and then a late night jump at 1300 feet tomorrow night. There is nothing like the feeling that being “on purpose” can bring to a leader in life. — with Braden Wuerch at Fort Benning.

The post The Call I Have Been Waiting For appeared first on Ryan Wuerch.

The Miss America organization is the largest scholarship program in the world for young women. It provides more than $45 million in college scholarships each year.

My knowledge of Miss America is first-hand. My wife, Shawntel, is Miss America 1996. Through her, I began volunteering for the Miss America Organization in 2003.

Shawntel Smith, Miss America 1996

I am a board member and I’m committed to growing the scholarship program so that more young women can achieve their dreams.

About Miss America’s Scholarships:
The Miss America Organization is one of the nation’s leading achievement programs and the world’s largest provider of scholarship assistance for young women. Last year, the Miss America Organization and its state and local organizations made available more than $45 million in cash and scholarship assistance. This assistance is not just for the handful of young women who become Miss America, but is available to the over 12,000 young women who compete in the state and local competitions as well.

I am proud to be a part of this amazing organization.

Learn more at www.missamerica.org.

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